Thursday, February 16, 2017

why couldn't G-d answer the angels himself?

The Torah always puts the mitzvah of kibud av next to the mitzvah of Shabbos: you have it in the aseres hadibros in our parsha, you have it in the second dibros, you have it in Parshas Kedoshim - "Ish imo v'aviv tira'u v'es shabsosei tishmoru."  What's the connection?  Chidah in Nachal Kedumim explains that on Shabbos one has time to learn in greater depth.  When one is mechadesh in Torah on Shabbos it causes one's parents who are in the next world to be rewarded with a crown to wear, a special spiritual boost.  Shabbos thus provides the opportunity to fulfill kibud av even when one's parents are no longer here.  In keeping with that idea, please learn the divrei Torah for this Shabbos l'zecher nishmas my father, whose yahrzeit will be this upcoming week.  

The gemara (Nidah 70) writes that the people of Alexandria in Egypt sent 3 questions of derech eretz to R' Chanina ben Gamliel: how to become smart, how to become rich, and how to have good kids.  (We would all love the answers to those too, right?)    The first question was how to attain chochma, to which R' Chanina answered that the key is to spend a lot of time in yeshivah learning.  They replied that this can't be it, as a lot of people tried that and have not been successful.  R' Chanina responded that there is another ingredient needed as well: you have to daven.  The gemara concludes that you need both factors, both yeshiva and davning, and one without the other won't work.

The second question was how to get rich, and R' Chanina answered that the key is to spend a lot of time doing business (GR"A takes that out!) and to do so honestly.  Again, the people of Alexandria argued that a lot of people tried that and failed, and again, R' Chanina told them there is another ingredient necessary: tefilah.  The gemara here too concludes that you need both ingredients together.

The third question was how to have "banim zecharim," and R' Chanina told them that the key was to marry a good wife and to act with tzeniuyus.  You can guess the rest of the shakla v'terya at this point : )

I have a one simple question.  If the answer to each question was that you need X + tefilah, why didn't R' Chanina say that?  Why did he give the people of Alexandria only half the recipe at first, and only when they pressed the point and complained that the recipe did not work did he reveal to them that they needed to daven as well?  

The Maharal in his Derush al HaTorah says a fantastic yesod (in Tif Yisrael he says a different answer) that is worth knowing even if you don't think it explains R' Chanina's answers.  The gemara famously tells us that when Moshe went up to get the Torah, the angels complained and asked what this human being is doing up in Heaven, in their place.  Mankind does not deserve Torah and should stay back down on earth.   Moshe Rabeinu was afraid of what the angels might do to him, but Hashem responded that Moshe should just hold on to His throne and answer them, which he did.  Maharal asks: why did Hashem put Moshe on the spot and tell him to answer the angels?  Moshe was there on Har Sinai only because Hashem and told him to come up the mountain to get the Torah.  This was Hashem's plan -- why didn't Hashem answer the angels himself?!

Let me put the Maharal's answer in contemporary terms.  A guy or girl might go out on a date because their parents think the boy/girl would be a good match, their rebbe or morah thinks the boy/girl is a good match, their friends think the boy/girl is a good match.  But when that boy or girl is standing under the chuppah, if you ask him/her what they are doing there, oy va'voy if all they can say is, "My mother/father/rebbe/morah/friend thinks this is a good match."  If they can't say, "I can't think of how I can live without Bas Ploni/Ben Ploni; without him/her my life is incomplete," then l'fi anyiyus da'ati there is something very wrong.  When you are under the chuppah, no one else's sevara works to explain what you are doing there. 

"Yom chasunaso," explains the Mishna in Ta'anis, is the day of mattan Torah.  When the angels came to ask Moshe what he was doing there, no one else could answer that question.  G-d himself can't answer that question for him!  If you want to be mekabeil the Torah, the answer has to come from you.  Torah is the key to achieving perfection, but unless YOU first feel imperfect, lacking, incomplete, without it, you don't really deserve it. 

There are a lot of kids who sit in yeshiva listening to their rebbe drone on in shiur, totally bored out of their minds, feeling like it's a jail sentence.  If you ask them, "What are you doing here?" the answer these kids will give probably will have to do with where their parents want them to go, what is expected, lack of other choices, etc.  They don't feel like they would be missing anything by not being there.  You can't be mekabeil Torah unless you feel like you are missing something without it. 

Getting back to R' Chanina, I think the gemara deliberately left tefilah off the list of ingredients.  R' Chanina wanted the people coming back feeling, "We've tried everything you said and it hasn't worked for us."  He wanted them to acknowledge that their best efforts were not just goof enough.  Until they felt that there was something more needed beyond what they could muster on their own, until they felt their efforts were incomplete without it, they weren't ready for tefilah. 

So when you sit in shul and listen to Parshas Yisro, the question to ask yourself is, "What am I doing here?"  Hopefully the answer is not about your neighbors, your husband/wife's expectations, your kids, or your social position.  Hopefully it's about how you find fulfillment and where you find fulfillment.

Thursday, February 09, 2017

hungry for mon

A little halacha to start:

Chazal (B"K 82) tell us "ain mayim elah Torah" and darshen the pasuk in our parsha, "Vayeilchu shloshes yamim v'lo matzo mayim," as an allusion to the takanas Nevi'im (the Rambam says it was a takanah made by Moshe himself) not to go three days without public Torah study.  We therefore lein on  Shabbos, Monday, and Thursday.

Aruch haShulchan (135:5) says a chiddush that if for whatever reason the wrong parsha was leined on a Monday/Thursday, there is no need to do a makeup.

ולפי זה נראה לעניות דעתי דאף על גב דבשבת אם טעו וקראו סדרה אחרת דוודאי חוזרין וקורין הסדרה הזמנית, מכל מקום במנחה ובשני וחמישי כשטעו וקראו פרשה אחרת, מסדרה זו או מאחרת – אינם צריכים לחזור ולקרות. דכיון דאינה עולה לקריאת הציבור, שהרי בשבת הבא יקראוה מחדש, ולא נתקן אלא כדי שלא יהיו שלושה ימים בלא תורה, ומשום יושבי קרנות – ולכן בכל מה שקראו יצאו ידי חובתן. ואפילו אם נזכרו באמצע הקריאה נראה לעניות דעתי דמה שקראו – קראו, והמותר יקרא במה שנצרך היום לקרות. 

It seems like there are two parts to his argument: a) we will hear the whole parsha anyway on the upcoming Shabbos; b) the takanah of leining on Monday/Thursday is very different from the takanah of leining on Shabbos.  You have to read a specific sidra each Shabbos, but during the week the crucial point is that Torah be read publicly at least once every three days -- what you read is not important, so long as you read something. 

Is the idea of not going three days without hearing Torah the geder of the takanah, or just the reason behind instituting leining on Mondays, Thursdays, and Shabbos?  A possible nafkah minah might be the question of what to do if leining was missed on a Monday (quoted in Ah"S 135:7).  If the geder of the din is to avoid a three day gap without Torah, then maybe leining should be made up on Tuesday, which would avoid the gap.  On the other hand, if the takakah designated Monday and Thursday as leining days, then there are no makeups.  Avoiding a three day gap is why the takanah was made, but does not define its parameters. 

Secondly, a little machshava thought:

Did Bnei Yisrael, coming right off kriyas Yam Suf, really think that Hashem was going to starve them in the desert?  That they would not have what to eat, and had to complain to Moshe for food?

The Sefas Emes teaches that a person can have all he/she needs to eat and yet still be hungry. 

Baruch Hashem, I see in the newspapers ad after ad for Pesach hotels and vacations, but so many people who have so much these days are so dissatisfied with life.  They have an endless hunger for more and more and are never filled up.

We know the navi tells us that at the time of redemption there will be a hunger, but not a hunger for food or drink, but a hunger for the dvar Hashem.

Bnei Yisrael had food, but they wanted more than gashmiyus food to fill their bodies with -- they wanted food that would also be dvar Hashem.

"Posei'ach es yadecha u'masbi'a l'kol chai ratzon" -- the Midrash notes that it doesn't says that Hashem is masbi'a with ochel, food, but rather Hashem is masbia and fulfills people's ratzon, desire.  If your ratzon is just for a good meal, Hashem can give you that, but if your desire is for the dvar Hashem, then He will give so much more.

That's why Parshas Eikev, in describing what Hashem did for us in the desert, the Torah tells us, "va'yi'ancha va'yarivecha va'ya'achilcha es ha'mon," Hashem made us hungry and then gave us the mon to eat.  Why does the parsha mention the hunger?  That was the complaint, the problem.  The pasuk should just tell us the wonderful thing Hashem did to solve the problem!

Sefas Emes answers that in this case, the problem was itself a bracha.  By all rights we should have been happy to just have enough food.  But we weren't.  We had a hunger and desire for food that also would be dvar Hashem.  That hunger could only be satisfied by the mon.

The Ch haRI"M teaches that on Tu B'Shevat it's decided what chiddushei Torah one will gain during the upcoming year.  In other words, Tu B'shevat is not about filling up on dried fruits (or fresh fruits).  It's about being hungry for Torah, for Eretz Yisrael, for ruchniyus things. 

Thursday, February 02, 2017

teaching others for your own sake

The purpose of the makkos, says the Torah, is "l'ma'an tisaper b'oznei bincha u'ben bincha," so that we will relate what happened to our children and to our grandchildren, "v'yidatem ki ani Hashem," and to know that Hashem is the One in charge (10:2)  Seforno comments that "v'yidatem" means so that YOU should know, whereas the beginning of the pasuk, "l'ma'an tisaper," is speaking about what future generations will know. 

Isn't that backwards?  Shouldn't the "v'yidatem" come first, i.e. don't you need to understand the lesson yourself first, and then "l'ma'an tisaper," you can give it over to your children and their children?

The lesson here between the lines is that teaching our children Torah is not just something we need to do for their sake -- it's something we need to do for our OWN sake.  Teaching others is a tnai in our own understanding and yediya.  The best way to solidify your own beliefs is to express them and try to impress them upon others, especially those who matter most to you, like your own children. 

Moshe told Pharoah that the terrible plague of grasshoppers will be something that, "lo ra'u avosecha v'avos avosecha," the parents and grandparents of the Egyptian people had never before seen. (10:6)   Why didn't the Torah just say that there was never something like this before in Egypt?  Why stress specifically that their parents and grandparents had never seen anything like it?

The Sefas Emes (5644) quotes a Zohar that when a child gets married, even if c"v his/her parent has passed away and is in gan eden, the parent's neshoma is allowed to go down to the world to be at the chuppah with their child.  The same is true on the opposite side of the coin as well.  When the Egyptians were punished, the neshomos of their parents and grandparents were sent out of gehenom to be with their offspring on earth.  The parents and grandparents of the Egyptians had never seen such grasshoppers in their lifetime -- but now, they were going to see it.

Maybe this is also part of what the Torah is telling us by putting "v'yidatem ki ani Hashem" at the end.  A person may have already passed into the next world, but because they fulfilled "l'ma'an tisaper," because their children and grandchildren continue to grow in Torah, then through "b'ra mizakeh aba," they too are their vicariously sitting alongside their children and grandchildren in the beis medrash, reaping "v'yidatem ki ani Hashem" in greater measure.      

On a final note, last week I posted my wife's query whether a place that women meet in for davening has kedushas beis knesset.  Aruch haShulchan 154:7 writes:

 וכן בית הכנסת של נשים – יש עליה קדושת בית הכנסת, כיון שהנשים מתפללות שם.