zos chanukah; a beautiful diyuk from R' BenTzion Mutzafi that teaches us how to settle arguments

1) Today is the last day of Chanukah, known as "zos Chanukah."  Rashi in parshas Matos comments on the pasuk at the beginning of that parsha  זֶ֣ה הַדָּבָ֔ר אֲשֶׁ֖ר צִוָּ֥ה ה׳ that משה נתנבא בכה אמר ה׳ כחצות הלילה וגו׳ (שמות י״א:ד׳), והנביאים נתנבאו בכה אמר, מוסף עליהם משה שנתנבא בלשון זה הדבר.  What's the difference whether the word כה or the word זה is used?  Maharal explains in Gur Aryeh: 

ונראה, כי ענין זה הוא תולה בנבואת משה רבינו עליו השלום ומדריגתו, כי הנבואות הם שתים; האחת הוא שנתנבאו בה כל הנביאים על מעשה ה׳ והנהגתו בעולם, לכל אשר נעשה בעולם. והמדריגה של משה היה כולל זה, וכולל גם כן להתנבאות על המצות והתורה שצוה לו השם יתברך מפיו. וזאת המדריגה היא אינו דומה לראשונה, כי המדריגה הראשונה בדברים אשר יחדש ויעשה בעולם, והמדריגה של משה רבינו עליו השלום היא התורה מה שהשם יתברך רוצה שיהיה נוהג תמיד בעולם מבלי שינוי, והוא סדר מציאות כללי בעולם. כי בתורה אשר נתן השם יתברך על ידי משה, סידר את ישראל בסדר כללי, לא בענינים המתחדשים בפרטים מן הסבה הראשונה, שזה אין המדריגה כל כך. 

The word זֶ֣ה means you can always point to the thing; it's axiomatic, true for all eternity, in all times and places. כה is what is true in a particular context, based on circumstance.  

וזאת התורה אשׂר שׂם משׂה.  Only Moshe had the level of nevuah of זה and not just כה that was needed to gives us זאת התורה , a Torah that is eternal.  

Chanukah is not just about what happened centuries ago when we needed to be saved from the Greeks.  זאת חנוכּה, it is an eternal truth, it's about the salvation of the Jewish people in all times and in all places, now as well and then.

2) R' BenTzion Mutzafi has a beautiful diyuk in Rashi in our parsha.  The parsha tells us that Yosef imprisoned Shimon and allowed the other brothers to return home (42:24).   וַיִּקַּח מֵאִתָּם אֶת שִׁמְעוֹן וַיֶּאֱסֹר אֹתוֹ לְעֵינֵיהֶם  Rashi explains that it was only in the other brother's presence, לְעֵינֵיהֶם, that Shimon was locked up, but once the brothers were gone, Yosef released him and gave him food and drink לא אסרו אלא לעיניהם, וכיון שיצאו, הוציאו ומאכילו ומשקו.  We understand that Yosef would release Shimon from jail once the coast is clear, but why does Rashi add that Yosef also fed him and cared for him?  Why are those details important and deserving of mention here?  Rashi is based on the Midrash: רַבִּי חַגַּי בְּשֵׁם רַבִּי יִצְחָק אָמַר לְעֵינֵיהֶם אֲסָרוֹ, כֵּיוָן שֶׁיָּצְאוּ לָהֶם הָיָה מַאֲכִילוֹ וּמַשְׁקוֹ מַרְחִיצוֹ וְסָכוֹ.  I am not sure why Rashi cut off the last words מַרְחִיצוֹ וְסָכוֹ, but the point remains the same.  Furthermore, did Yosef really need to be personally involved?  Didn't Yosef, as the head of Egypt, have servants who could take care of preparing the food, or bathing Shimon?  Later in the parsha when Yosef hosts all the brothers, the Torah tells us that Yosef told others prepare the food  וַיֹּאמֶר לַאֲשֶׁר עַל⁠ בֵּיתוֹ הָבֵא אֶת הָאֲנָשִׁים הַבָּיְתָה וּטְבֹחַ טֶבַח וְהָכֵן כִּי אִתִּי יֹאכְלוּ הָאֲנָשִׁים בַּצׇּהֳרָיִם, so why not here as well?   

We learned 2 years ago a yesod from R"Y Salanter, which the Netziv develops as well, on the pasuk (Mishlei 17:13)  מֵשִׁיב רָעָה תַּחַת טוֹבָה לֹא תָמוּשׁ רָעָה מִבֵּיתוֹ.  The way most people understand that pasuk is not to repay a kindness by doing wrong to someone.  The Netziv, however, says that's not the pshat.  The idea of 'hashava' means returning something owed, like the Torah says in the case of theft, "v'heishiv es ha'gezeilah" -- you stole something, you have to repay it back.  If someone does you a favor, you obviously don't owe it to them to wrong them in return.  What the pasuk is talking about, explains Netziv, about is a case where someone wronged you.  In that case, tit-for-tat, you do owe them back wrongdoing, just like they gave you.  You might even think that this is the way to end the fight -- you wronged me, I wrong you back, now we're even and life goes on.  But it doesn't work that way.  What happens in that case is that the first party sees it as an escalation and responds in kind, and the cycle continues.   

The way to settle things is instead of responding to wrongdoing in kind, respond by doing a kindness.  Do something good for the other person who harmed you and their animosity will melt away and that will mend the broken bridges. 

This is what Mishlei is teaching us: you might think that מֵשִׁיב רָעָה, repaying a wrongdoing tit-for-tat in kind, evening the score, is the way to settle things תַּחַת טוֹבָה, instead of following this strategy of doing kindness; kah mashma lan לֹא תָמוּשׁ רָעָה מִבֵּיתוֹ, if you do that, the fight will never end.  The score will never be perceived as even and the argument will continue.

Shimon was one of the ringleaders in selling Yosef. Therefore, Yosef went out of his way to personally do good by him.  Yosef wanted to settle the quarrel and have peace.